Sorry for the late post today...Let's see, where to start? Well, I missed the first few minutes of the show and when I looked to see what I missed, apparently it was Semhar reciting poetry about "abandonment"... Say it with me.... Ugh. I mean, maybe it was lovely, whatever. Just... ugh. Maybe try a poem about being not very good at throwing coconuts, then I'll play along. Am I a jerk?
The part where I joined in was where Cochran was involved in "being the New Cochran." I honestly can't decide if I love or hate this guy. I want to like him, I really do. You too, right? He's so eager and really, really has embraced being "New Cochran" which is lovely. He's using a machete to open up a coconut and is quite proud of his accomplishment. And you love it until he tells us that his mother told him not to go around using a machete by himself... and that he's disobeying her by doing exactly that. Ummm... how old is New Cochran? I do like that he's breaking the apron strings... maybe this will translate to some independence when he gets back home. Maybe? Or, maybe he'll go home and continue to refer to himself in the third person as "New Cochran." Either way, I enjoyed how he was so excited to share his coconut with Keith & was so proud, saying it was "like his own child." Keith, of course, says, "So, I'm drinking your child?" Heh. Yeah, Keith's a bit of a jerk. We'll get along just fine.
Jim, on the other hand, our chief dope distributor (and I mean dope in the noun vs adjective sense), is a bit of a wiener. He keeps telling us how smart he is and I'm fairly sure that we're going to hear every episode how he's a world poker champion. Uh, good for you. Generally, people who need to tell you all the time how smart they are.... well you know. So Jim figures he's controlling the game by making an alliance with Ozzy & Keith. Keith, meanwhile, has already made an alliance with Ozzy because....well.... see the paragraph above. Keith is 1) a bit of a jerk and 2) way cooler than the rest of us.
Ozzy, our Jesus de la Jungle, has found the immunity idol. Which, is ACTUALLY smart (ummm, Jim? Take notes.) And, on that note, I really enjoy watching Ozzy climb trees.
Back at the blue camp, Christine finds the clue to the idol but can't actually find the idol. Thing is, she does it in a blatant way where everyone knows she either has an idol or is looking for it. Not super smart.
Coach decides to add to his alliance by palling up with Edna, whose sun visor is made out of a Survivor clue! I thought it was tree bark, but you can see the writing on the one side. I have decided I adore Edna, solely because of this. Is that wrong?
Now... Baby Hantz. Let's talk about Baby Hantz. Since the theme today seems to be how smart (real vs. imagined) people on this show are.... where would you put Baby on the scale? Last night, I'd put him at the bottom. First off, he comes clean to Coach about being Russell's nephew. Now, let's remember that this has more to do with honesty than it does with strategy. It turned out to be a good strategy, oddly, as Coach's whole thing is to play with "honesty & integrity & loyalty & honour" blah, blah, blah. Don't get me started on that, but at least he HAS a strategy. So, in a way, Baby's idea of blabbing to Coach is a good one... be up front & honest, show Coach that you're in his corner, that you - unlike your uncle - can be trusted. Now, Coach has pretty good instincts and has decided to trust Baby on this. (And as an aside... is it not a bit scary that Coach seems like the reasonable person here? The wise one?) So, OK, chalk one up for Baby.
That's where it all unravels for our little Loco, however. He's got a thing against Mikayla. Why? Because she's pretty. Yep, that is it. That is his only reason. He figures that because she's pretty, she's Parvati. Naturally pretty = using your body to get what you want and 'wrap all the guys around your finger.' Uh huh. Now, let's all agree that Mikayla IS indeed pretty (she's the lingerie football player, 'member?) but really has NOT been playing it up a la Parvati. Everyone is in their undies, not just her. (Let's not talk about how they're blurring out Coach's junk. Oh, dang.) She even tells us that she's actually kind of a tom boy and that's why she likes playing football. She just happens to be able to get paid to do it in lingerie. OK. Baby Hantz, however, keeps giving her the creepy cut-eye and keeps talking about how he's a married man and can't be around this sort of temptress. Uh, what? Clearly, Baby has gotten himself in some Loco trouble before with his woman. Clearly, Baby's woman has laid down the law. Baby is not to be around lingerie football players. See, here's the thing though. 1) She doesn't actually care about Baby. 2) Even if she did, he acts like she'll just seduce him and he'll in no way be able to resist (is this how it works, men?) 3) Being pretty does not equal being a harlot. And 4) so, what does he do in real life if say, a pretty girl works with him or is on the same bus? Run? Read her Bible verses and tell her to cover up & pray for her soul?
Oh, and it doesn't end there, does it? So Baby desperately wants to get rid of Mikayla at Tribal Council. Thing is, no one else does. Everyone else is normal and thinks that Mikayla is both nice and a hard worker. Oh yeah, and she kicks ass at challenges. No one else has a reason to get rid of her. So Baby goes to work on his plan, which really isn't a plan at all. He tells Coach that Stacey and Christine are voting for Mikayla. To be clear, they are not.
Now, if this was anyone else, it might not be a problem but it's Coach. Coach's strategy (again, it IS a strategy, even if it's weird) is to "lay it all out on the table" at Tribal Council. Coach tells everyone that Stacey & Christine are planning to vote for Mikayla. They plead that no, they're not. Baby gets all worried. Christine tries to get Coach to say who told him that & he won't. You see, 'cause he's loyal to Baby. Albert totally had it right. Do you love Albert? Now there's a smartypants. At any rate, I very much enjoyed watching my boyfriend Jeff's delight at the scene unfolding before his eyes. He just gets to sit back & let this stuff happen... you can't script this stuff and this is why I still love the show. There's still that bit of human craziness factor that you can't predict.
So, Christine got the boot, which actually was easy to predict, non? Not so good at the challenges, and did nothing to endear herself to the tribe. We called it last time, when she told Coach he's "temporary" and then went off looking for the idol. Again, not so high on the smart scale, right? Why do people forget about the social part of this game? It's like they've never watched it. Poor Christine. The good news for her is that unless it's a poetry competition, she'll probably have no trouble beating Semhar at Redemption Island. Maybe they could have an eye roll-off. I think Christine would still win.
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